This just in! I’m ready to start the next chapter in my life. I want to have a kid! But not yet… I have went through phases throughout the last couple of years. Some days, I would see my friends with their cute kids supporting them while they were on stage in their cute little band manager onesies or doing something cute in a video I saw on facebook and think I want one. Then I would also have days where I would be in store or somewhere public and someone’s kid would be acting up and annoy the heck out of me. And I would think, now way! I do not want a kid. The same goes with my fi. We could not decide. And I have finally made sense in my head of why we have been in such a wishy washy phase.
It’s bad timing!
Neither of us want to live here in the area where we are forever. And we are not at a point in life where we can leave yet. We are super excited to be getting married and making revolutions in life like having a child. But we can’t have one now! Not while we are here! We would never get to leave. We need to wait. And while I’ am a little scared and it may be risky, it will happen when the time is right. We may be on the road…we may be living in another city or even state, but we will be happy where we are. We will not be here. If we had a child and then left, the family would be devastated. However if we had one while we were already gone, it would be much less saddening to them. Just something I have cried over before. But now I feel better.
I am happy with this phase in my life!